The Eucharist… My True Love Hidden in the Broken Bread

Let me start my reflection on the eucharist by sharing a quote from the words by St. Augustine of Hippo… “ We have dark times ahead of us.  But you will be a light in the darkness, a light of love.  If you keep silent, keep silent with love.  If you speak out, speak out with love.  If you discipline, discipline with love.  If you forgive, forgive with love.  Let love take root within you.  For only goodness can arise from this origin”… Love.

In our modern world today, people are too busy with many things that we only have a very limited time to spend with family, friends and make a personal reflection of where we are heading in our life journey.

With our very busy lifestyle, most of the food we eat are instant.  To conform to one’s idea and be connected to a person is only a matter of clicking the “Like” button.  We get connected to people in an instant in a very shallow and virtual manner, their is no sense of a deep connection.

Same thing that is happening when we go to mass every Sunday, we no longer know the essence and true meaning of the holy sacrifice whenever we commemorate the breaking of the bread that was instituted by Jesus Christ 2,000 years ago.

 

Because we are not aware of the immense power of the word we utter as we recite the vocal rituals and the exchange of sacred words between the priest and the faithful; that was pass on every generation through sacred tradition, their is no longer a deep connection to the one who loved us first whenever we attend the holy mass.

To some it is a Sunday obligation, to others a routine to perform.  To the fundamentalist, the eucharist is a symbolic sacrament to remember.  We forgot that we come and partake in the holy sacrifice because we deeply love and commit ourselves to our True Lover.  A commitment to love! To be one with God IN love … Love, who is God…

Most of us are not aware of what’s happening when a simple bread and wine transubstantiate into the true and real body and blood of our Lord Jesus Christ by the power of the Holy Spirit given to his anointed priest in the sacrament of holy orders.

How I envy the participants of the 51st Eucharistic Congress held in Cebu City, Philippines with the theme Christ in us, our hope of glory.

I hunger to know deeply in the ordinary things that are hidden in the mystery of the Eucharist.  I want to understand and to experience the overwhelming and profound richness and meaning of the broken body of Christ, through listening and spiritual formation.

I intensely desire to listen to the talked given by Papal legate Charles Maung Cardinal Bo; Fr. Timothy Radcliffe; Rev. Robert Barron; Fr. Luciano Ariel Felloni and other speakers as they share their own personal experiences on the Eucharist and how it transformed their life to holiness and wholeness.

I see these holy people as living martyrs for Jesus because they witness and stand for the truth.  They speak and evangelize the truth. They live what is expected of them as disciples of the ancient Catholic Church.

As a lay person, I can only share my humble understanding on how I experience the unfathomable beauty of Jesus Christ hidden in the broken bread.

I confess that I am a sinner hiding in an angelic naive look, a modern hypocrite and a charming liar.  I own up being deceitful, manipulative and proud… a sinner, filthy and devastated.  And that is my own miserable truth.

Just like the parable of the prodigal son, I rather go back to the house of my father, as I swallow my pride and serve him as one of his servant. However, in spite of my shortcoming, my father prepared a feast for me, embraced me and dress me with the finest robe. Making me realize how I am deeply loved.

It is a good thing to know that through Christ Jesus we can find hope and eternal salvation. His mercy is overflowing! He allowed my brokenness to surface for others to see His healing grace, mercy and love.  How amazing!  Again, quoting the words of St. Augustine, “God allow us to be lost in able to be found.”

Experiencing the merciful love of God in my filthiness and brokenness is truly redeeming!  It made me keep in touch with myself, my feet on the ground, slow to judgement and to realised that I have nothing to boast but only my nothingness in the presence of the Lord.

The desire to be holy is a lifetime struggle.  To be worthy to partake and be one with the true body of Christ in the most holy Eucharist is to recommit our baptism vow by denouncing sin and Satan with conviction.

As human as we are, we are inclined to concupiscence because of the original sin that we inherited from our first parent. We are weak whenever temptation knock in our door step. That even though we do our very best to abstain from sin, we find ourselves repeating the same sin over and over.  As St. Paul said in Romans 7:15, “For I do not do what I want, but I do what I hate.”…. very true and I hate it!

To arrive to holiness is to detach from our worldly attachment.  Especially to something or someone that is so precious in our life; in exchange to what is truly eternal and divine, which is the broken bread and blood of Christ, celebrated in all the ends of the earth.  A test of faith that God alone suffices.

Holiness entails sacrifice and mortification to experience detachment from all these gross worldly desire in its most painful way. It is only by the grace of God we can truly enter and be victorious with all the temporal desire that easily perish.  Small victories are pathway to holiness for us to create a stronghold to avoid the occasion of sin.

To strive for holiness is to guard our words, thoughts and action, in accordance of being a true disciple of Christ.

In my heart, I admit that I struggle everyday to be holy and to be an authentic martyr for Jesus.  But sin hinders the holiness I desire.

Like dark clouds that hide the moon from my sight, I cannot see the beauty of God clearly. But I know behind those dark clouds, the moon is there wherever I go.

God’s love is unconditional!  Unchanging! This simple thought is already a divine revelation.  It is a substantial bearing to make every effort to persevere and to be holy, where absolute comfort and security is in store for us.

The real and true presence of God the Son, in the form of bread and wine that we receive in the holy sacrifice of the mass, is no doubt the sacred heart of Jesus that unite our soul and spirit in divine union.  How wonderful to know!  Amazing grace!

In my miserable state of being, my Jesus look at me lovingly; always with me, carrying me in my wounded and wrecked spirit.  He heals my broken soul unceasingly and forever so faithful even I am so unfaithful.

May we truly experience God’s love and mercy in the most holy sacrament of the Eucharist, where we receive every source of spiritual blessing, inspiration and hope.

In my very little knowledge in the mystery of God, I proclaim and believe that to be truly holy is to be sincere in all our ways; to be a witness to the living word of God; to experience being broken like the Christ crucified with a thankful heart; to live a life of poverty and chastity free from all worldly attachment,  so we can genuinely share the Christ in us … our hope of glory!

 

Communion Prayer

My Jesus,I believe that you are present in the holy sacrament.  I love you above all things, and I desire to receive you into my soul. Since I cannot at this moment receive you sacramentally, come at least spiritually into my heart. I embrace you as if you were already there and unite myself wholly to you, never permit me to be separated from you.  Amen

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Silent Love

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7) NIV

 

It is good to contemplate especially when you are deeply in love with a person. Being with the one you loved is no wasted time. Every second is so precious, every detail of action is so important. Every breathe that comes out from the other is heart pounding. And the sacredness of a loving caress truly make you ask for more.

 

One thing I notice is that when loving couple are together privately, (sharing with my own experience) loving sigh and silence, are the best words to understand what the heart and soul says. The mere silence of the significant other says it all. You are surrounded with different profound emotions and expression of love. Pure happiness enfolds you and everything fall automatically, without any effort at all. Sacred and loving silence, without uttering a word, truly penetrates the innermost faculties of one’s heart and soul.

 

True love is a two way stream, NOT ONE WAY. It’s a TOTAL connection of yourself to the other. It’s a divine union with the one you love… ONE! You can understand what I am talking about ONLY IF you did fall in love deeply and gave a 100% of yourself in a relationship. IF, you gave ONLY a 99% and still save a 1% for yourself, frankly, you’ll not understand what I am sharing and talking about.

 

When I am alone in the most Blessed Sacrament (Perpetual Eucharistic Adoration), same thing I am experiencing with the True Lover of my Soul, Jesus Christ (as St. Therese of Lisieux described Jesus, the Lover of my Soul) I felt no boredom, but pure enjoyment in the silence of love. Being with the one you truly love made every moment especial. No uttering of words but every detail of silent conversation is so profound. No words… no thoughts… but overwhelming conversation of the heart and soul… ONE! Understanding is effortless! Alone with God, He taught me to LISTEN, to SURRENDER and to be CONSUMED by His infinite grace. What a very comforting feeling that only my True Love can give.  Absolute security!

 

Silence is an inward maturity. Some people thought, that being physically silent, specifically by not talking or raw prudent make them arrive in a contemplative way of life. Silence is a gift, a grace from God. It is not a special spiritual tool of greatness or spiritual advancement. There is no such thing as advance in the realm of spirituality. We are all beginners to understand God’s love and every experience is quite unique. Like a child who submits to his father’s love, it entails total trust and complete surrender. This enveloped a deep relationship with the divine- self, arriving to God’s loving, powerful and holy presence. The doctors of the church manifested the same experiences, and that is simply being deeply in love with their Creator, their True Lover, Jesus Christ… this not require a higher knowledge or theology. It is God’s infinite wisdom that guide and taught them with the mysteries of His divinity and divine love… a basic fact.

 

Let’s go back about being in love. A person who is deeply in love expresses so much his inward disposition on the exterior. You can see love in his eyes, in his lips, in his gestures, the way he move his hands, the way he smile, the way he talk or whatsoever. Love manifested in his countenance with tremendous power, overflowing blessing and peace. The same thing, you can easily see a person who is faithful in his prayer life and if he is spiritually grounded, if he manifest all these in his action and character. Particularly, I am referring to holiness manifesting! Personally, describing it as holy silence within. Tame, joyful, loud, shining, simple, gentle, pure and very powerful!

 

Also, the essential and grounded verity is… experiencing all these grace and consolation is a balance of being human, with both feet on the ground, likewise, humbly coming home to God with a child-like heart, desiring to enter His grace and be carried in His loving arms.

 

As I end, let me share with you that your friend honeybrisket is not perfect.  Unworthy as I am… God who is all merciful have a purpose for me, for you and in every situation. And this purpose is always the best for us. God uses every situation, whether the persona of that circumstance is ugly, disgusting, poor and helpless… All these are opportunities for individual growth and maturity, an avenue to change, a metanoia. For all people grow but not all people mature. And holy silence can be a great teacher in finding ourselves in the center of our being and in the community we are part with.  It is being mindful of God’s presence in every detail of creation and that is a blessing of overflowing faith.

Peace to you my friend!

 

P.S     Please read my older post and I hope that in my small way, I can extend God’s love to each and everyone.  For my non- catholics friends this is an extension of the many good things that life has to offer.  In peace and unity… Honeybrisketbabyfat.

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Prayer and Love

To pray is to LISTEN!

 

One theme of this blog is PRAYER, but in my previous entries, I haven’t posted any prayers yet.  Allow me to share with you some of my favourite prayers that I usually recite mentally when I’m in solitary.  Or sometime whenever my personal prayer ceases me, that I needed the aid of these very beautiful and profound prayers from the heart. 

 

I will not share on HOW to pray, but only to impart few of the well known prayers that I loved the most. Likewise, on how I arrived and experienced my personal union with God through prayer.   

 

For we all have our unique ways of praying.  Whether by means of meditation, contemplation, singing, dancing, work and prayer, breathing or simply just being still… or… just “to be”… and the most simple way is to pray without words and“IN” love.

 

Okay, let me give you an example… 

 

When a person is in love… I mean deeply in love.  Often, words need not to be uttered anymore.  The body language, the eyes, the loving smile and gesture express it all!

 

When you love someone, you just want to listen to his or her stories.  You find sweet intimacy with every breathe and words coming from that person.  Every detail interest you.  Mutual understanding is automatic and effortless.

 

When you receive a kiss from the one you loved.  It is good to feel that passionate kisses by simply closing your eyes and being carried away to the heavens above!  No words… but only loving kisses… in silence.  (Oh my! Now I miss my sweetheart.)

 

Without malice but in the union of loving couples, (let me emphasize again being “deeply in love”), often you just behold the person’s beauty.  Sometime you stop for awhile and gaze on everything about the significant other.  Loving sigh!  You are speechless and at the same time every moment is sacred with that person.  (This is not a valentine pro bono okay haha!)

 

In my humble opinion, expressing prayer in silence and sacred romance is nearly quite the same.  Though here, we are connecting ourselves to God (sacred moment with God).  What I am trying to say is that, prayer is like being with the one you love.  A love song that lifts you high, that brings you to the heights of perfection.  Wherein you will only find peace, comfort, healing and love.  This is a simple thought that I expressed and experienced in my personal prayer.  I don’t know the theology of prayer but I would like to share with you what I knew from my heart. 

 

Every time I will watch EWTN (Catholic Network) I am so consumed by the prayers of Mother Teresa of Calcutta.  Whenever she will recite the Family Prayer, I will find myself in total peace of being.  I chew slowly and savoured every sacred word until it penetrated the innermost faculties of my heart and soul.  What a refreshing consolation!  Pure joy and profound peace!  I hope and implore that you’ll find and experience the same joy and peace that I enjoyed. I suggest you read the prayer slowly…

 

(Mother Teresa composed this prayer for the United Nations International Year of the Family)

 

 

Heavenly Father, you have given us a model of life in the Holy Family of Nazareth.

Help us, O loving Father to make our family another Nazareth

where love, peace and joy reign.

May it be deeply contemplative, intensely Eucharistic and vibrant with joy.

Help us to stay together in joy and sorrow through family prayer.

Teach us to see Jesus in the members of our family especially in their distressing disguise. May the Eucharistic Heart of Jesus make our hearts meek and humble like His

and help us to carry out our family duties in a holy way.

May we love one another as God loves each one of us more and more each day,

and forgive each other’s faults as You forgive our sins.

Help us, O loving Father to take whatever You give and to give whatever You take

with a big smile.

Immaculate Heart of Mary, cause of our joy, pray for us.

St. Joseph, pray for us.

Holy Guardian Angels be always with us, guide and protect us.

Amen.

  

 As I recall when I was in Mindanao, one of my monk friend told me before… Honeybrisket… “For you to arrive at everything, desire to possess nothing.”  

 

 

Truly, God will fill your brim if you are “empty”.   How can God fill you when you are already filled with so much worldly attachment that are futile and that easily perish?  “Let my prayer be is to desire for nothing that I may possess everything!”  And God is my everything!

 

One classic prayer that I loved so much and I doubt many adults don’t usually pray this anymore, is the Angel of God.  Whenever I recite this prayer, it always make me arrived to be a “kid” at heart.

 

Angel of God,
my guardian dear,
To whom God’s love
commits me here,
Ever this day,
be at my side,
To light and guard,
Rule and guide.

Amen.

 

Lastly, a short sacred song that I usually play in my room when I’m alone entitled Sacred Space by Sr. Eppie Brazil, OP.  Very invigorating when accompanied by rhythmic breathing and meditation, this mantra of sacred song is so perfect that it will permeate every cell of your being.  So refreshing!

 

“Deep within me now is a Sacred Space,

And to God I bow for this gift of grace”

(Slowly repeat over and over until you are consumed by the prayer,

until you become a prayer yourself.)

Utter the prayer… Pray mentally… until you become silent in prayer.

 

I hope I imparted not only inspiring thoughts from my previous blog, but sharing with you inspiring, simple and beautiful yet profound classic prayers from the heart.  And I will really appreciate if you could also post your personal or favourite prayers here in my blog.  That will be great!

 

Let us all be a living prayer in this world!

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Are You Good or Evil?

 “Respect beget respect”…. I want to picture a world that is perfect, a world at peace and harmony.  I can create all these possibilities in my mind where in people of all walks of life, faith, race and tongue can be equal and united.  Though this is hard to imagine.  Too perfect to be true. 

For your kind knowledge, your sweetheart honeybrisketbabyfat is not an atheist.  I am a friendly catholic who welcome everybody in my humble piece of heaven.  And this blog is an extension of my sacred space wherein I can write down my thoughts without the fear of discrimination and judgement.

In my opinion, there are only two kinds of people in this world.  And that is good and evil.  In every organization, community or family, these two can be found. 

When I had a business trip in India last 2007, I visited a Hindu temple.  Being curious, I walked inside, that I may see how the interior structure look like.  To my surprise, there is a big wooden sign outside the temple gate written… NON HINDUS ARE NOT ALLOWED INSIDE THE TEMPLE.  Oh!  I cannot take some pictures to take home.  Nevertheless, I just enjoyed taking some pictures outside.  However, there are some small temples that are meant for tourist viewing.

Anyway, me and my Indian friend who is also a Catholic Christian shared about this thought.  Oh! We are lucky to be Christian!  In our faith, everybody are welcome …  a very simple and short thought.  That God, our Lord Jesus… WELCOMES EVERYBODY… INVITES EVERYBODY… rich, poor, whoever you are, whatever you are… COME! Let us feast!  And enjoy the overflowing banquet that I have prepared for you.  But who came?  The poor, the people who know nothing… the simple people.     

Modesty aside, but in my very young age, God let me experienced to travel some part of the world.  I have witness different culture, different belief, different norm and different faith.  But as I sum it up, nothing is really far different between me and the people from around the world.  And yes!  I have observed much grounded similarity.  That all over the world, there is only good and evil.  They are everywhere!  They might be in your workplace, inside the monastery, the school, the government and “within” us… GOOD AND EVIL…..     

If you notice that in my two previous entries, “A Tribute to My Beloved” & “In The Presence Of My Enemies” I welcomed some of my beloved guest (readers) in my cyber blog “unity table”. They come from different faith who wrote me in my personal email that they are one with me in peace, unity and love.  Some are buddhist, some atheist, some muslim, other catholic and christian alike. 

I also had some bad experiences to people of different faith.  However, I also have A LOT of good experiences with them.  This is a very simple reason and an avenue to define our purpose of reaching out, sharing God’s love, sharing our faith to our brothers and sisters who have different views, concept, and ideology with what they know, with what they believe. 

Maybe, if I am born a muslim, I will still share this kind of approach in writing my thoughts.  Or maybe, if I am born a buddhist, perhaps, I will still write the same thing, having the nature to be one with the entire creation.  If I may quote one of my atheist readers’ comment… “I agree, and I plan to go and be a better atheist. The idea is that we strive to be better people and love one another. It’s a new year, change is in the air, now it’s time to move forward! –from Scatheist ( Comment from my entry” In the Presence of My Enemies”)

Wow! This one soul uplifted my heart!  Sweet heaven!  And he put a very handsome smile in my face after I read his comment.  This is not an issue of stereotyping & branding.  But in my humble belief… it’s the good and evil all over the world.  The good and evil “with us” … “in” us.   

Just a thought…

What is in the heart of Gandhi when he kept silent and walked for peace?

What is in the heart of Mother Teresa of Calcutta when she is reaching out for the poorest of the poor?

What is in the heart of Pope Benedict  the XVI when he uplifted the ex-communication of the bishops of the Society of St. Pius X?

What is in the heart of St. Francis of Assisi when he renounced all his richness and human comfort?

What is in the heart of Pope John Paul II when he visited and embrace Mehmet Ali Agca, the turkish man who shot him in Vatican, May 1981?

“The Lord gave us the grace to be able to meet each other as men and as brothers,” – Pope John Paul II.

 

 My mind cannot truly grasp and understand all these things.  But my heart is telling me that these works of love are truly amazing, a giant stride to change a human person’s heart.

“For faith is the substance of all things that we hoped for”… and I hold on to my little faith to understand these works of love.  And I believe these great people see things universally.  They see things as ONE.  They see SOULS and not just mere human beings.

Who is righteous anyway?  Pick up a stone and cast it.  We are free to do whatever we want.  And I must say, there is nothing harm done to choose and express what is good, and share the goodness of the Lord in our lives.

Peace to all! (Not faction) 

 

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Sunset of Love

I hate saying goodbye especially to my love ones. It brought me to tears seeing my beloved uncle suffering from cancer. Different emotions enveloped my being, sadness seeing him suffer, and joy as he share the passion of Jesus on the cross.

Often us people have a morbid fear of death, but I see death as an entry to life itself. For everything are temporal and will easily fade. I remember uncle Boy uttering my name, and he is always requesting me to read the bible in his death bed. Or perhaps to sing praises or healing songs just for him to ease the pain, as I gently sung those beautiful words of healing…

“I am beautiful… I am loved… I am forgiven by the mercy of God”. As I sung this short sacred song to my uncle over and over, I’ll just find him in a sound sleep. Sometime my spirit is drooping whenever he wanted me at his side and will call for me to talk about God’s love. I cannot think of a word to say but seeing my uncle suffer in pain make me arrived at the cross of Calvary, making me closer to God, in my mind, I am serving God through my uncle, reconciling with Him in my small way. Truly God uses us to the full if we will just allow ourselves just “to be” It brings me to deeper humility as I shared God’s love with my uncle. If he only knew that I benefit and learned more from his depressing situation, spiritually and psychologically. He is not a usual church goer, neither a man of prayer. But telling him that it is never too late to ask for repentance and mercy, for God’s love is infinite and steadfast. He asked me once, Raymond, what should I do for me to cope up? To be loved by God and for Him to bestow mercy on me a sinner, full of resentment and hatred in my heart? These questions always go around my head up to now. A question from a dying person. Well, what did I told him… I hold his hand, smiled at him and told him lovingly… What we should do for God to love us more? As I paused for a few seconds and look at him straight in the eyes …. NOTHING!…. For God’s love is infinite, eternal, steadfast, unchanging and encompasses everything. It cannot be less, just sufficient, for God is love. But human love change easily, God’s love never change.

At the age of 51 my uncle pass away, he reconciled with his parents, siblings and neighbors, likewise, with his immediate family. Moreover, experiencing the merciful love of God brought him to a peaceful death. Truly it is never too late to fall in love and be “IN” love with our Master, Healer and Friend… and that is our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. This great lesson in life taught me how marvelous God’s love for us all, how He hold us lovingly in the sunset of our lives. What awesome pardon in God’s sacred heart that is overflowing! How sweet to contemplate in it… That I am loved by God, He who loved me first.

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